Ever have one of those moments where all of a sudden you doubt your abilities, start to feel inadequate or distracted in life? Well this just recently happened to me. One minute I was feeling excited about what Gods doing through me and was making major moves, then the next moment I felt like I was freaking out, thinking I can’t do this and that I am not worthy of this work! The enemy is really good at messing with our minds! He gets into our thoughts and likes to twist Gods promises for our lives so that we become crippled with fear or stagnant with doubt, ultimately stopping us from living out Gods promises for our life. He is such a bully!
So, there I was relaxing at home, minding my own business. I’m sitting on my couch working on the illustrations for my children’s book, when this punk tried to come for my mind! This fool had the nerves to start reminding me of my past, of who I used to be, mistakes I’ve made and guilt and shame I have felt. He tried to make me feel inadequate and that I am not cut out to do work that will build Gods kingdom and glorify Him. I began having thoughts of “who do you think you are? No one cares, you cant do that!” I will tell you, he almost had me for a second by making me feel inadequate and distracted! But, I quickly recognized that it was the enemy and decided to remind his behind what he was not going to do and of who I AM! When you belong to Christ and spend time with Him, you will be able to discern when its Him or if it’s the voice of the enemy. After he has gathered his own flock, he walks ahead of them, and they follow him because they know his voice. They won’t follow a stranger; they will run from him because they don’t know his voice John 10:4-5.
I had to stop everything and had to start stirring myself up in the Lord and what He says about my life! I had to let the devil know as the Lord reminded me of: 2 Corinthians 5:17; This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun. Romans 8:1 So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus. You see, I no longer have to live with guilt and shame of my wrongs because God has made me new and has forgiven me!
Sometimes you have to evaluate your life and ask yourself “what may have given the enemy an open door to sneak in and make me feel inadequate or distracted?” We capture their rebellious thoughts and teach them to obey Christ 2 Corinthians 10:5. In my case, I decided to log off of social media for a while and dig into my Bible, listen to sermons related to what I was going through/feeling and worship. I had to bring the peace back to my spirit.This helped me remember how powerful Christ is in my life! The enemy knows this and will try to attack us so that we don’t move forward with purpose. I continued to let the Holy Spirit remind me of who holds me in the palm of His hand. During this time, I believe this beautiful message was placed on my heart by the Lord! “This is not just a book, it’s the beginning of a ministry that’s being birthed!” Yall have no idea what that meant to me! Here I am, this girl, having a moment of feeling lost, inadequate, clueless, trying to walk by faith, yet unknowingly belittling the assignment God has given me! I had been under the impression that it was just a little-ole book. I’ve made is seem so insignificant or tiny as I would talk about it to others. When in actuality, God has a bigger purpose for it. Ummmm, sorry God! Forgive me for not trusting your ability to use little-ole me for your glory!
